The B Word

December 13, 2014
By:  The Mogambo Guru

Jeremy Warner at telegraph.co.uk summed it up best when he wrote “To still be running massive budget and current account deficits at what may well be the top of the cycle is a truly dangerous place to be. Hang onto your hats.”

I gotta admit that I stopped reading right there, as I was instantly reminded of Bette Davis saying almost the same thing in a movie, adding, with that famous smirk of hers, that “It’s going to be a bumpy ride.” Hahaha! A bumpy ride indeed!

Although Mr. Warner was referring to the well-deserved economic and fiscal misery of Britain, one finds that a well-deserved “truly dangerous place to be” is also Here, There and Everywhere, which is a song by the Beatles.

Now, obviously a person does not have to be a seasoned conspiracy theorist, like me, to instantly -- instantly! -- see the sinister connection that Britain, Bette and Beatles all begin with the letter B. There is obviously a clue in there. Perhaps a vital clue!

Other words that begin with the letter B are “boobs” and “burritos,” which are a stupid but welcome comic relief, a clever literary device, used to temporarily defuse the unbearable tension of being on the edge of a massive mystery, but not knowing what in the hell I am talking about.

Still analyzing this important (and only) clue, another word that begins with a B is “busted,” which is defined as “Busted, a word that begins with the letter B, as in busted out, burned down, broken, bamboozled and bankrupted because the evil Federal Reserve and their laughable Keynesian econometric gibberish has been creating excess cash and massive amounts of credit (=massive amounts of debt) for thirty years to fund both 1) a cancerous growth of government spending and government beneficiaries, and 2) inflation in prices that make the poor poorer and reduces the real (inflation-adjusted) returns of every profitable investment to insignificance and makes every loss even worse.”

Of course, this is just the abbreviated definition, containing only a few of the ugly results of such a suicidal monetary expansion, which is on top of the treachery of repealing the Glass-Steagall Act so that the evil banks can take your deposited money and invest it for themselves, and if the investment wins, they keep the money, and if the investment loses, then you’re stuck with the losses. 

And now, thanks to new legislation by the Congress, the taxpayer is suddenly responsible for a massive, unbelievable $300 trillion in derivatives owned/financed by banks, because the economic system is now so dependent on corruption after corruption that nothing can change it, meaning that cash and credit (debt) will continue to be created in ever-increasing amounts so that the government will grow like a malignant cancer and the economy continue to sputter, until the economy collapses in a Huge Stinking Heap (HSH), as confidently predicted by Ludwig von Mises of the Austrian School of economics, which is (since you were too shy to ask) the only true theory of economics, and I spit (“ptui!”) on all the other stupid theories, the takeaway being that if you are NOT buying gold and silver with a frantic, manic urgency born of unrelenting hysterical fear, then there is something very wrong with you.

Hey! That’s it! Bust is a B word! That’s gotta be it! And handily proving my Mogambo B Theory (MBT), I might add, and again demonstrating my Super Awesome Mogambo Genius (SAMG) to all the naysayers who disdain my wisdom in things gold and silver, and say hateful things like “You’re an idiot!” and “Shut up, we’re trying to watch Gilligan’s Island on TV in here!”,

And because I love them and wish to save them from their folly, I gently say to them “Harken to my words! All the way through history, this kind of fiscal and economic stupidity means that you should be buying gold and silver, you lowlife morons who are so stupid that it makes me sick and makes me wonder how such a clot of butt-heads could possibly be related to me except by some long-ago tragic mix-up at the hospital where they took my intelligent kids, with their superior DNA who would easily understand the urgency of buying gold and silver and this whole Mogambo B Theory (MBT) thing, and exchanged them for you brain-damaged kids so that I get stuck with all your silly crap.”

Then, instead of thinking this over before gratefully thanking me for my fatherly persistence until they finally understood the vital significance of all this, like you would expect, I get my wife asking me if I remembered to take my damned pills, and all of them laughing at me, saying “See previous paragraph about you being and idiot and to shut up!”

So you can see how I would LOVE to throw this Mogambo B Theory (MBT) in their snotty faces!

Alas, it was not to be! Mr. Warner continued with, not a B word, but a C word, as in “Conditions will be getting decidedly ugly again in the new year.”

Okay, I was wrong about how the alphabet can be used as a coded market-timing device, but I was decidedly NOT wrong about the historical evidence demanding -- demanding! -- the immediate accumulation of gold and silver.

And I am not alone in thinking this, because, as an evidentiary fact, Chuck Butler of Everbank in his Daily Pfennig newsletter, writes “with every other Central Bank (except the U.S., U.K. and Japan) adding to their Gold reserves, you have to stop, and ask why? Don't you?”

Bank! Hey! It’s the other B word!  Britain, Bette, Beatles, Bank! Of course! It’s so obvious now!

The riddle almost solved, your brain instantly completes the chain of words with the correct B word, which is Buy, as in “Buy as much gold and silver as you can, especially now that the biggest bunch of crooked lowlifes that ever lived (the central banks) are finally getting some smarts, and especially because of the low, low prices of gold and silver, thanks to actual government/bank manipulation of the markets, that are enticing the banks to buy gold for themselves!”

And so, my darling Junior Mogambo Rangers (JMRs), celebrate with me that the famous Mogambo B Theory (MBT) is finally and exhaustively proved, allowing one to fearlessly buy gold and silver bullion with no fear whatsoever.  And celebrate, too, that, once again, it is happily and wonderfully shown that “Whee! This investing stuff is easy!”

 

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